Javier Bardem’s hair

Javier Bardem in THE COUNSELOR. © Copyright 20th Century Fox.

Can you tell how a good a movie is going to be by the state of Javier Bardem’s hair?

There are plenty of reasons to look forward to the upcoming movie The Counselor: the cast features Micheal Fassbender, Brad Pitt, Penelope Cruz and Dean Norris (best known for playing Hank the DEA agent, a.k.a. Walt’s brother-in-law, on Breaking Bad). It’s directed by Ridley Scott (the Ridley Scott, I hope, who made American Gangster, not to mention Alien, Blade Runner, etc., and not the one who cranked out Prometheus last year). And even more intriguing, the screenwriter is Cormac McCarthy, author of All the Pretty Horses, Blood Meridian, The Road, and of course No Country for Old Men.

2007 Oscar winner for Scariest Hair: Javier Bardem in NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN. © Copyright Miramax/Lionsgate.

But the most exciting news is that Javier Bardem has another fabulous hairstyle in this movie. If you’ve seen Bardem’s unforgettable turn as Anton Chigurh in the Coen brothers’ 2007 adaptation of No Country for Old Men, you can know that few actors can make a simple hairstyle into such an integral part of his onscreen presence. In this case, a 1964-era Beatles ‘do that’s so downright weird that it’s crucial to the confounding sense of evil that Chigurh represents.

Like something out of The Ed Sullivan Show in hell: Javier Bardem in NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN. © Copyright Miramax/Lionsgate.

And let’s not forget the memorable, impeccably styled blonde locks that Bardem wore as Silva, the villain in last year’s James Bond movie Skyfall. Surely no one who was loyal to her majesty’s secret service would flaunt this lavishly tended ‘do:

Not to be confused with Blofeld or Goldfinger: Javier Bardem as Silva in SKYFALL. © Copyright MGM Studios, Inc.

The Counselor is Cormac McCarthy’s first original screenplay; Michael Fassbender plays a lawyer in the El Paso area who gets involved with the Mexican drug trade, hoping to score some easy money and then get out. (I’m sure things will work out just great for all the characters.)

While I don’t want to get my hopes up too high, given the cast and the screenwriter here, I doubt there’s another movie in 2013 that I’ll be more curious to see. My only concern is that I hope The Counselor isn’t redundant to McCarthy’s earlier treatment of drug running in No Country for Old Men. (The Coens’ adaptation was one of the best movies of the past decade.)

A few publicity stills from The Counselor came out this week. Note how, as befits a lawyer making his first foray into shady business, Fassbender’s character has a more sober hairstyle, and is no danger of upstaging the unabashedly flamboyant Bardem character. It’s probably safe to say that the lawyer is out of his depth here:

Hair's to you: Michael Fassbender and Javier Bardem in THE COUNSELOR. © Copyright 20th Century Fox.

The Counselor opens October 25th in the U.S. A mere three months away, but given the type of stinkers that open in the dog days of August (see this demoralized post from last Labor Day weekend), surely I’m not alone in wishing we could just fast-forward through the rest of the summer and get to fall.

In the meantime, should Javier Bardem ever be in search of artistic inspiration for his future roles, here are a couple of hairstyles he might want to consider sporting. Think of what he could do if he rocked “the Clapton”…

…or better yet, the Ziggy/Aladdin look:

Feel free to weigh in